Clifton 'H-Man' Haymaker and Carol 'Clyde' Sally are detectives in the Organized Crime unit of the notoriously corrupt King City Police Department. Given a seemingly pointless assignment--to investigate the meaning of a card bearing only a rough sketch of a bearded man--they follow a baffling underworld trail of copy store clerks, pornographers, dubiously retired crime lords, and politically connected contractors to find themselves at the feet of city hall, the U.S. Army, and the baddest bearded ninja ever to grace the silver screen. Would it be a good idea to consult your doctor before viewing this movie? Will career officers have harrowing flashbacks during the action scenes? Probably.

Huggy Bear Award